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The Shadow


She's like a shadow. You feel her presence in the dark sometimes when you're scared of the too quiet house. Sometimes she's a little scary too.

But are you scared? No, of course not. She's not there. Of course, she isn't. You're just being stupid. You're nervous because exams are around the corner. You're jittery because of all the caffeine you've ingested during the day.  You're just lonely and getting paranoid.

Sometimes you're scared. Really scared because you know what she can do. Even though you know she's not real. Of course, she isn't. Only stupid people believe those things. Only the weak fall for that crap and you are not weak, You're better than this. You deserve more than that.

So you rise above it all. You work hard and win. You win at everything because that's what you do, right? That's what better people do. They win. Of course, she's not watching you. She isn't there. She can't be now that you're winning because winners don't have to deal with all that. They're better than falling for that nonsense.

You doubt yourself sometimes. You doubt your faith in the fact that she doesn't exist. But you shake your head and go back to winning things. You don't want to start pulling at that thread. You don't want to see her. You don't want her.

One day, randomly you see her. Really see her. You're at home, taking a break from winning things and you look into a mirror. And you see her.

She's smiling smugly just like you do when you win again. She's won too. Only now that you're seeing, you can see she won more than you.

When you fall, you realize that she's been here all along taunting you to win.

Mental health is an important issue to me. A lot of people live in denial and do not seek the help they need. They hide behind fake smiles and snarky remarks. They go out and have a good night, They work hard and become successful, They don't acknowledge their scars because they can't be seen. They're easily hidden. They just go on with her hanging on to their side making stupid comments all the time, They go on without trying to shut her up and get real peace. Because she couldn't possibly shut up, right? Right?

 Sorry for the strangeness.



 Love, 
K



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